Well, it has been way too long. I apologize. Accelerated nursing school during the week and caring for Dorian on week-ends while James is away with the band have left me with no time to blog. I had this past week off from school so I put “write massive blog update” on my 10 page long list of things to do. Deleting my other blog is another – having my own personal blog was great in theory, but two blogs to keep up with is insane. So for those few readers of “Becoming a Better Kelly,” I am sorry for your impending loss. Rest assured, the cancellation of said blog in no way means I have abandoned my quest at becoming a better me. I am simply more focused on school and my lovely family than my blogging career at this time.
Dorian is the cutest child ever right now. Seriously. I am having the time of my life with him. Thank goodness. I LOVED the newborn and infant stages (apart from the sleep deprivation). But the past 6 months or so have been rough. Of course, I never stopped loving my child. But oh my god, he was able to press my buttons. He can play me like a fiddle. The temper tantrums and whining were driving me insane!!! And oh my freaking god…the sleep issues. The horrendous, awful, never-ending sleepless nights and sleep battles. We stopped nursing when he was 15 months old (in January). Looking back, I think that was about the time I really started finding the parenting thing challenging. I got really sick toward the end of our nursing “journey” – desperately sleep deprived, too many calories sucked out of me by my ever-hungry, half-my-size child, a trip to England and the resulting major jetlag on my child’s part, and then three illnesses in a row. Upon our return from England, it was straight back to work at the accounting firm for tax season (with long commutes each day), in addition to taking my last two nursing prerequisite courses. That was a rough time for me. Then when we finally got the boy weaned, we started seeing more temper tantrums. (Of course I am aware there was probably a connection, but it’s hard to stop and rationalize everything when you’re exhausted and in the middle of a 16-20 month old’s meltdown). I was so tempted to go out and have my tubes tied then and there. I kept having mini-breakdowns where I would cry to James about how I never wanted any more children and if he did, he’d better go out and find someone else to procreate with. It’s so funny looking back on it now.
For the past month or so, Dorian has been a model child. He consistently sleeps 10 hours a night, rarely waking in the middle. If he does, it’s usually because he has to go to the bathroom (we’ve started potty training, though I kind of wish he’d just go in his diaper in the middle of the night!) He was taking 2-3 hour naps each day, but lately there are some days where he goes without. No matter, because he is generally pretty happy even without the nap. He is a changed child. And I am a changed mama. Sleep has made all the difference for all of us. I adore being a mother. I envision more children in my future again. So James is even happier. Dorian is happier because he’s sleeping. Because I am more rested, I am able and willing to play with him more and do fun things with him whenever I have time. I am also happier being in nursing school and doing something I love. I have to face it, some people are meant to be stay-at-home parents. I am not one of them. I loved being at home for the newborn stage, and when we have more children, I hope to have the luxury of doing the same. I think the first 6 months would be ideal. But after that, send me back to work! I need adult time, brain time and to be honest, a break from parenting! Luckily, James is more than happy to be at home with Dorian. It couldn’t have worked out more perfectly.
We decided to pull Dorian out of his planned start at the Montessori school this fall. While we were thrilled with our choice, it was simply too much for us to commit to financially at this point. The director gave us a massive discount for the year (she’s a family friend), but we realized we couldn’t even swing the rest. Plus, we didn’t want to put him in the school for one year, and then have to pull him out next year or the year after when we realized full tuition was too much for us. Yes, nurses make a decent salary, but if we want to have more kids, we can't afford Bay Area private schools. Plus, who knows where we’ll be next year…I don’t know if you all know this, but there is a hiring freeze at all Bay Area hospitals right now . They are not hiring new nurses. This is actually happening in many places all over the US. There is still a massive nursing shortage that will continue to grow, but in the meantime, with the recession, it is too expensive for hospitals to hire and train new nurse grads. So we’ll see. Hopefully, we won’t have to move to Wisconsin or North Dakota next year. In the meantime, James is doing a fabulous job parenting Dorian. We have memberships to the Oakland YMCA (swim lessons for Dori and childcare when we want to work out), Gymboree play & music classes, Oakland Fairyland, Oakland Zoo, Oakland Museum of Children’s Art (art classes!), and Lotus Bloom (our local playgroup center). We plan to join Studio Grow when winter settles in as well. With so much to do in the Bay Area and a parent as hands-on as James is, Dorian is not getting cheated out of any stimulation or education by not being in school.
Dorian is talking and talking and talking. He’s saying full sentences now. Still some jibberish thrown in, but boy does he like to talk! I swear, he learns about 20 new words every day. Some of his most used vocabulary words include ”Delicious, tasty, poopoo potty time, computer, guitar, music, banjo, piano, drums, pizza, dirty, clean, ice cream, puppy, Stella, Grandka, milk, hot, cold, train, Mama, Daddy, car, walk, uh oh!” He calls me “Mummy” when James is around and “Mama” when he’s not. He laughs a lot. He pokes fun at himself. He’s got quite a sense of humor! Thank god for those Brit genes. He runs. He dances. He is soooooo close to jumping – it’s hysterical to watch him bend his knees and try to bounce off the ground. He adores trains – his Brio trainset is his favorite toy at the moment and he gets excited every time we see a train. He LOVES giving kisses and cuddles. He gives me a huge hug and kiss first thing every morning and then proceeds to grab my hand, pull me into the kitchen and say “Eat, eat, eat, eat, eat, eat.” Yes, our boy still adores eating. He’ll eat anything and everything. He is a pure joy to be around right now and I can’t believe how much fun we’re having with him. He makes us laugh constantly. This age is the BEST!!!!!!
See for yourself...
