Dorian has bonded!

He has a favorite stuffed animal - finally! It is a little owl my mother bought him. He loves to poke it in the eyes and say "Eye, eye!" He also makes him fly through the air and he says "Peep, peep, peep, peep." He doesn't quite get it's not a baby duckling. He also feeds the owl and likes having him for company at his dining table...have a look!

Warning: Rambling Post Ahead

I will post loads of pictures within the next couple days, but first, can I just say how excited I am for James to return home tomorrow? Oh my god, I can not wait. This has been the hardest separation by far. Dorian is just such a handful (delightful as he is) and it really is impossible for one person to take care of him 24/7. At least if that person wants to keep their sanity. He is sleeping so much better now, but the first week James was gone and after his parents went back to England, I thought I was going to die. No, seriously. I was so fucking tired. I was almost back to the exhaustion breakdown point I reached after our Christmas England trip and then illness city in January. Luckily, I didn't lose massive quantities of weight or get sick this time (no Swine Flu here!) After a few days of practically having a nervous breakdown each day, my mother stepped in and took over (I'm sure she would have stepped up sooner but I wanted to try to do everything on my own - I feel like a bad mother when I don't). She went back to her old routine of putting Dorian to bed in his bed and then leading him back to his room every time he got up and sternly telling him to stay in bed. We did this about 2 months ago and since then Dorian's sleeping had improved. I think Jen and Grae's visit (and a 3 day trip away), our trip to Bakersfield, and then James leaving really threw off Dorian's sleep schedule again. That boy needs routine like I need chocolate. Plus, he REALLY knows how to play me. He knows I'll eventually crack and let him come into bed with me. I couldn't survive if I didn't do that. Anyway, back to my mom...so she put Dorian to bed and down for naps for about 4 days in a row. The change was remarkable. He has been taking naps every day for the past week or so. Long ones. Going down easily without crying. Staying in his bed. Talking to himself until he falls asleep. Happy when he wakes. No temper tantrums during the day. He's been going down easily for bed. Not quite as many mid-night wake-ups (only 2-4 versus 6-8 we had that first week) and the last few mornings (except for this morning) he slept until 5:30am! He had been waking by 4am every day.

I know some people think I complain too much about Dorian's sleep (I had to drop some Facebook "friends" recently because they told me as much and I refuse to remain "friends" with people who don't support me emotionally). But truly, this kid just doesn't sleep sometimes. I am not exaggerating. I can survive on 5 hours of sleep a night. I'm not asking for 8 solid hours. But this kid was giving me 3-4 broken hours of sleep if I was lucky. And no naps. And then being a major pain in the butt during the day. I was exhausted. Sleep deprivation is horrendous. I am feeling much better now, but boy, I hope he doesn't regress to that point again (particularly while I'm in the intensive nursing program which starts in 3 weeks!) I hate feeling like a pessimistic complainer who can't function or enjoy her child's development. It's awful. But when you're that sleep-deprived, the only thing you can do is focus on not killing yourself or your child (I don't mean by suicide or murder - I just mean by not crashing your car, trying to stay awake enough to make sure your child doesn't stick his fingers in a socket, trying to feed yourself and your child, etc). It is really, really hard and I can see how parents end up having breakdowns or worse. I was *this* close. Truly. Thank goodness I have my parents and a wonderful group of friends. My mom helped out with bedtimes and naptimes for several days. My parents took Dorian on some outings each week-end. My friend Kate took Dorian three weekdays for me so I could sleep (I could not have survived this tour without her - she also got Dori to nap the days he was with her). My friends Nathalie and Wellington watched Dorian one morning so I could run, and my friend Renee watched Dorian another morning so I could run some errands. I am very, very lucky to have such a fabulous support system. Anyway, I know this has been rambling and this isn't even supposed to be my complaining blog anymore but I thought it had been awhile since we posted a sleep update on this blog. Fingers crossed...we really have turned a corner over the past week! When James returns home, we're going to work on getting Dori to stay in HIS bed all night long. I think part of the reason he wakes is because I roll over or whatever in my sleep, and wake him. Or he wakes because he knows I'm there and will cuddle him and hold him close if he cries. I know we need him out of our bed for sleep's sake, but I must admit, there is a part of me that will sorely miss cuddling him as we sleep. I love that boy so much. And I love my husband and can't wait to see him tomorrow (and not just so he can do Dori-duty for the next few weeks).

Language Explosion

Woah. Wow. Phew. This kid can talk! In the last 36 hours, I swear, he has learned a couple dozen new words. I'm not kidding. Something must have clicked in his brain a couple days ago because there's no shutting this kid up now. He is repeating every word I say and then using it correctly (while pointing to the correct object) again later in the day. It's incredible. In the past day and half, we have added the following words to his already strong 18 month old repertoire:

table, water, cereal, spoon, pineapple, watermelon, tiger, window, rug, turtle, piano, bus, truck, dirty, cold, bag, bread, bib, flower, yogurt

"Dirty" is my current favorite - he says it with a strong American accent and he definitely understands what it is. He went to a spot on the kitchen floor that had caked food on it and pointed, saying "Dirty, dirty." It was great. We just need to get him a mop now.

He has repeated numerous other words - he's mimicking EVERYTHING - so it will be interesting to see what else he has retained.

Wow! It's amazing! I told you this kid was a genius!

18 Months Old

These pictures were taken on Dor's 18 month "birthday" in his new trendy hippie clothes. James goes on tour and the first thing I do is take Dori and I shopping! We both got new clothes (I worked overtime the last couple weeks of tax season and we got a big tax refund so I was able to justify it to myself). I just love buying clothes for Dorian because we don't do it very often. Hannah gives us a lot of hand-me-downs from Rowan and Joshy, and my mom loves to bring home an item or two of clothing every now and then. We also have bought a bag of clothes each year at the White Elephant Sale since Dorian was born (we spend like $15 for a massive garbage bag full of used clothes). But Dorian needed a swimsuit and I couldn't resist buying these cool hippie-style shorts, brown polo shirt (I love the chocolate browns on little boys!), and surfer top while we were out. And I got him to smile for the pictures too...guess how? He has learned to say "Cheese" for the camera and he thinks it's hilarious!









Note: If this weren't a picture of a child, I'd love for someone to photoshop a joint in D's hand - the expression on his face looks like he just took a big drag out of a joint and is holding it in (coupled with the position of his fingers, the hippie top, and just chilling on the sidewalk - it would make an awesome pic!)

Catch Up

As usual, time passes by. I know you're all thinking, "How very profound - I now remember why I visit this blog." Okay, that was supposed to be funny. Was it? Or is my shameless effort at humor funny in and of itself? Or am I failing miserably? I know this is not my complaining blog anymore (visit www.becomingabetterkelly.blogspot.com later tonight for complaints and vents) but let me just say this: I am tired. It is hard, hard work caring for a toddler on your own. James gets back in 1 week, 2 days and I can not freaking wait. Thank goodness for my friends Nathalie and Kate, and both sets of grandparents. Graham and Jenny watched Dorian the first 2 days James was away. Nathalie & her husband took Dorian for part of last Sunday (along with their 2 kids!) and Kate watched Dorian 2 six hour days for me this week. My parents are going to help out this week-end and I have Kate and another friend lined up to help out next week. I simply can't do 14-16 waking hours every day (plus broken nights) for 19 days straight on my own. I don't know how people do it. I would literally go insane. Anyway, enough complaining! Poor little Dor has been cutting his last two teeth the past week so I know that added to the poor sleeping. And he does miss his Dad - he keeps running around the house, opening doors and calling out "Dada." It's very sweet. When James talks to him on the phone, he calms right down and just listens wistfully. I am so glad those two have bonded. I really do feel like James and I are equal parents now. In the beginning, it was all about me because I was the milk machine. I liked that at first, to be honest, but now that we have temper tantrums and still sleep issues to deal with, I'm glad James is as responsible for him as I am!

Dorian is a handful right now because his sleep is still so wacked and temper tantrums can be plentiful when he's tired. But, let's put all that aside for the moment and focus on the wonder that is this child. He went to the pediatrician this week for his 18 month check up. The pediatrician was very impressed with Dorian - he told me Dorian was without a doubt the smartest child he'd seen in years and a bonified child prodigy. Dorian measured 34 inches long, which is more than half my height now, and the 90th percentile for his age. He was 26 pounds which was about the 50th percentile for his age. Nice and healthy. He got a couple shots, the last to come for about a year or so.

Dorian has a vocabulary that grows by the day. Today he said 5 new words! Amazing. I'm sure I'll forget some but his vocabulary now includes: more, dog, duck, owl, chocolate, apple, cracker, cookie, banana, poopoo, uh oh, chair, book, guitar, car, ball, cup, bowl, bubble, eye, nose, bottom, hair, ear, shoe, sock, hat, light, choo choo (for train, obviously), up, down, hot, cheese, cream cheese, waffle, Teletubbies. He can point to all his basic body parts (I'm working on teaching him the major bones now: femur, tibia, clavicle, etc but he doesn't seem to be catching on yet). He puts his hands on his bottom and says "Uh oh" and/or "Poopoo" when he has a bowel movement. Sometimes he'll also go grab us the wet wipes. He's started doing this when he pees too! (We're going to start potty training when James returns.) He makes a lot of animal noises too - dog, cow, sheep, tiger and bird noises. He sings songs now - he actually sings the melody to "Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star" and does all the hand movements. He understands so much now. We can give him directions and he'll follow them like the obedient child he always is - ie "Get your shoes," "Close the door," "Turn off the light," "Sit down," "Arms up," "Bathtime," "Please get me a pen," etc. He is so sweet - he knows I need my glasses first thing in the morning, so the first thing he does when he gets out of bed is find them and give them to me. He plays games all the time now. He was pretending to pluck the spoon out of the bowl of mush in "Goodnight Moon" the other night and then pretended to feed me with it while making eating noises. He kisses his stuffed animals all the time and tries to feed them real food. He loves giving cuddles and hugs. He has been happy as a clam in the jogging stroller so I can run every other day. He is really a joy to be with when he is rested.

I will post a series of photos over the next few days. First one to come tonight.

Tour

I've been very lax keeping up with this blog while Kel is working, sorry. I promise not to let it die when she starts nursing school. Since my parents came over they, Dori and I have: driven to Bakersfield for a Tempest gig (pictures in the previous post); visited Mendacino for a few days by the coast; been to to Oakland zoo, Fairyland, Studio Grow, Lotus Bloom playgroup, Gymbouree and Golden Gate park; had an Easter egg hunt; and visited countless playgrounds and parks. Way too busy to blog! My parents have been taking pictures as have I, so expect a major photo post soon. Over to you, Kel! I left for the East coast on Wednesday as Tempest has a three-week spring tour. I write this at 2 in the morning after our first gig (very well, thanks for asking) and should probably get some sleep, we have a 5 hour drive to a gig in Iowa tomorrow.

Family Day

James' parents arrived last week from England and will be staying with us until April 20th. Dorian remembered them when they got off the plane - he got a really big smile on his face and gave them both big hugs! We were so thrilled about this. He last saw them about 2.5 months ago and he is still just a baby, so it is great that he remembered them.

On Saturday, I had the day off, so Jenny, Graham, Dorian and I accompanied James to one of his gigs. We all had a wonderful day in Bakersfield. (There's a sentence that doesn't get said very often). The weather was perfect - about 75 with crystal clear skies, radiant sunshine and just a very gentle breeze. It was glorious!

The highlights: James and Tempest played well, as usual, and the crowd loved them. It was the first time Jenny and Graham saw James perform live with this band so I was relieved there were no mishaps or broken amps or anything like that. They were very impressed with their son's playing and his rock star moves (as was I, of course). Graham got very sunburnt (he was so red by the end of the day, he literally looked like a lobster) but he was drinking so I don't think he minded. Anyone could tell he was a Brit by the end of the day. He was completely sunburnt, drinking his lager, drooling over fish and chips...Jenny and I watched him sit at a table and hungrily watch a family eat fish and chips for about 10 minutes - it was hilarious! We love you, Graham! Jenny was interviewed by a television station and was soooooo excited about it. You have to remember, they're from a tiny village in England and TV crews don't tend to frequent Bridestowe. As she was telling us about her interview, she talked it down saying, "Oh you know, I am sure it was only a local station." We laughed so hard at that one. (Like a Scottish festival in Bakersfield would have made national news!) We love you, Jen!

Dorian was amazingly happy all day...no temper tantrums, no crying, no crankiness, no tired signs. Just smiles, giggles and running around (of course, the usual story -Dori isn't smiling in any of the photos!). It was a wonderful day. The perfect day. Seriously, it was the best day I've had in ages and reminded me how lucky I am to have the best family in the world (in-laws definitely included).

Facebook

I regularly post photos of Dorian to my Facebook page. If you are on Facebook and not already one of my friends, leave a comment with your email address and I'll add you (or look me up). If you are not on Facebook yet, what is wrong with you??? I love Facebook. It is awesome. Get on it already! We are taking so many photos of Dorian, it is easier to upload them all to Facebook (you can do a whole folder of photos at once). This site is great and I love blogging, but it takes ages to get photos up!

Dori and the Dentist

Dori had his first dentist appointment this week. We love our dentist. Dr Scott McKinzie and his wife Kate, who runs the business, are wonderful, as are the people they employ. You should definitely check them out if you need a dentist - tell them we sent you. :D Here's the link to reviews on Yelp (and their website). They sent us a baby gift when Dorian was born and always give him toys whenever James or I come in for an appointment. When James went to see them a couple years ago, there was a glitch with his dental insurance. Kate and Scott wrote off around $1000 worth of dental care because James' dental insurance had expired (through his previous job) but we did not know that. It wasn't their fault but they felt bad they hadn't checked on the status of the insurance before the work was done. It was totally unnecessary but amazing of them to do that for us. They are wonderful people and of course, very importantly, provide the best dental care possible.

We hadn't really considered bringing Dorian to the dentist until he was 3 or 4. However, James and I both had our teeth cleaned this month and we asked when Dori should have his first appointment. They said they could see him now (for a major discount). The dentist can tell a lot already and can make sure there are no major dental structure issues or decay. Dorian brushes his teeth daily so his teeth looked good! The dentist confirmed Dori does indeed have 2 more teeth coming in right now and should have 4 more coming within the next few months. He will need braces in several years as his teeth are crowded (apparently, they can tell how the permanent teeth will come in too). We weren't that surprised...both James and I had braces. I wasn't able to go to the appointment because I was at work, but James said Dorian did well. Of course, as usual, you can't tell from the pictures. He looks so unhappy!

Dori, Mama & the Newborn

My friend Adeelee recently had a baby...Dori and I took a visit to see Oren, 9 days old (at the time). It was lovely to hold a little newborn again - he was so tiny!!!! I have completely forgotten how small Dorian once was!

The proud mama with her baby boy.
My friend Erika was there too...she was definitely Dori's best friend for a couple hours!

Dori definitely seemed like a toddler, a little boy, after seeing the newborn!